Did we once... have a joke thread? General Chat

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by Malka, Jul 27, 2016.

  1. Malka

    Malka Member

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  3. who owns who

    who owns who Member

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    ????
  4. Malka

    Malka Member

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    It must have gotten lost because it was there when I hit Post Reply :102: and now I do not remember where I originally found it.
  5. Malka

    Malka Member

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    CaroleC likes this.
    [​IMG]
  6. Malka

    Malka Member

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    [​IMG]
  7. BronsonTheBulldog

    BronsonTheBulldog Member

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    Malka and CaroleC like this.
    You know when a Chinese person wants a takeaway what do they say? Ooh I fancy a 'local!'
  8. BronsonTheBulldog

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    I just watched a documentary on how ships are made and held together. Riveting!
  9. BronsonTheBulldog

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    Some people like cats, some people don't! And I heard that the Pope is a Catoholic!
  10. Malka

    Malka Member

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  11. BronsonTheBulldog

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    Malka and CaroleC like this.
    I love how the British are the only country to give holiday reviews based entirely on alcohol prices!

    'How was Prague?'...

    'How was it? £1.30 for a litre of vodka. And 40p a pint!'...

    'Were there nice museums?'...

    'Quite possibly, yes!'
  12. BronsonTheBulldog

    BronsonTheBulldog Member

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    You know your a dog owner when your at a restaurant, you ask for the bill and a poo bag falls out of your pocket when you attempt to pay!
  13. CaroleC

    CaroleC Member

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    They know you're a dog owner when it rains and you wear a poo bag as a rain hat!
    ps. they are also very good for wearing inside leaky boots.
  14. Malka

    Malka Member

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    You know you are owned by a dog when you tell them "go make peepee or poopoo for mommy.

    And you praise them when they have done!

    [Wouldn't be nice if human littlies were so easy]
  15. BronsonTheBulldog

    BronsonTheBulldog Member

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    Hope you make sure it's not a used one first lol! Brilliant for festivals too!
  16. BronsonTheBulldog

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    I was gonna settle down and watch passenger 57 tonight, but then I realised, I haven't seen the first 56 of them! :043:
  17. Malka

    Malka Member

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  18. BronsonTheBulldog

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    Sometimes it's just too hard to choose what to have to drink. Shall I have chardonnay, Schweppes or screen wash? Ooh I can't decide!

    20190303_143415.jpg
  19. BronsonTheBulldog

    BronsonTheBulldog Member

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    I just got pulled over by the police because I was swerving all over the road. The policeman said
    'Have you been drinking today sir?' So I said 'No officer.'
    'Well do you mind telling me why you were all over the road like that?'
    'I was warming up my tyres like the Formula 1 drivers do', I said.
    So he asked me would i mind stepping out of the car and walking in a straight line? Absolutely was my reply.
    As I was staggering left and right down the pavement he said 'what are you doing sir' to which I said... 'Warming up my shoes!' :043:
  20. Malka

    Malka Member

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    There are 2 cats. The one two three cat and the un deux trois cat.

    They had a race across the English Channel. Which cat won?

    The one two three cat because the un deux trois cat cinq.
  21. BronsonTheBulldog

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    Très bon Juli!

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